Thursday, May 25, 2006

Things that fail are over-managed and under-led

If only I replaced the word “Things”, with a word like “Organizations” or “Relationships”, it would have ‘won’ a better acceptance.

Why is that we cannot accept the fact that - Things that fail are over-managed and under-led. To start with, we have invested a great deal of time and energy (Ya that’s the word); to take control of things and ‘make’ them happen. In the process, of ‘making’ things happen, we loose the sense of wonder and awe, that is so vital to fortifying the good feel about what we do. No wonder, now ‘make love’, ‘work in a relationship’, ‘have an agenda for a coffee’, ‘define levels of freedom (ah! this is the worst)’, ‘intent becomes important than the gesture’ and ‘quality of life more important that living itself’.

Battling with the ever growing age, and 20 odd years of learning, we have already lost a major sense of awe and wonder. The normal no more excites, the chirping of the bird is too shrill to be noticed, and a simple smile renders to an analysis of the denture set and the colour of the lipstick, or a question pops up – why the smile? (Did you smile at this, NO! – You see, that’s what I mean).

If I do not manage, how can I ensure things go well? To answer that, let me take off on a tangential direction. Let’s recall, things that have really worked well – and ask the simple question – How much of the success was a result of ‘managing’ and how much of that was because we ‘allowed it to flow ~ala led’ and did some few things to ensure that the flow was in the direction we wanted.

Question: Is there a difference?
Answer: I bet there is – You are not forcing this to happen.

The ability to lead something, make the following assumptions:

1. You know what you want and are clear about it. (knowing and being clear about it are two different things)
2. You have understood the intricacies of the thing you want to lead
3. You are ready to accept that things in as is condition and then lead through a series of steps to better it to get your desired results
4. You appreciate the diversity that exits and tries to unify it.
5. You are passionate and convinced about what you are going to lead (not the end result)

When you manage – We make the following assumptions:


1. This thing is going wrong and needs to be corrected (very subtle right in the beginning and will evolve to greater measure as time goes by)
2. It does not matter what the genetic make up it is made of – here are the rules and here is the accepted norm
3. Results matter than the path
4. You always got a bad deal to start with – and now you have to clear the mess
5. what passion – get on with it

Both approaches have the same net driver – to better things.

One which is led (successful or not) leaves an experience worth a learning and a result worth a mention, the other when managed (successful or not) leaves a bad taste, that needs to be MANAGED all over again.

At the end of the day, result or no result, by either approach - Things that fail are over-managed and under-led.
Ah! Yes, let me add, the definition of failure fails
when we look in this paradigm.

Friday, May 19, 2006

“A short Term View” Vs. “A Long Term View”–Part 2

The problem with a sequel is that, if be-rifts an open acceptance, and imposes a benchmark, many a times which is in the mind of the reader – John, -2006

Here comes my part 2 of this blog.

God

Well, he knows all things, eternity to eternity. Some how, many a time, God seems so real – you can feel him, guide you and he is there in every step of your way – and some times, you just feel that He is up there; a real long way up.

Times when we look back and count the many blessings God has bestowed on you, we are puffed with a deep sense of satisfaction, and in the next moment – dismiss God out of our life, when a simple thing that you wanted did not happen.

These simple words in a prayer sum it all (adapted from RZIM)

Human Prays:
Your ways mystified me O lord, Oh Yes, in some journeys I feel you all the way, never doubted, but sometime you seem to vanish half way of that journey.

At other times, you appear to me in the very last moment and you know Lord, sometimes I actually fear that you will let me go over the edge

God Responds:
You are very Unique my Child, and I will help you learn of me with that uniqueness in mind,

You see, if I took every body all the way –Where is the room for their Faith?

If I took every body, more than half the way? Where is the room for their Love?

If I did not let you at times even feel abandoned, Where is the room for my Cross (Gods Salvation).

You are not what you will someday be, I Am who I Am! And I know how to get you from who you are to who I am, if you do not understand this, where is your hope?

A Day will come, Strength to Strength and From Glory to Glory, sometimes you will sense him half way through a tragedy, at other time you will come through in the last moment, Some days you might say, you let me go over the edge, and He says to you, Will you please understand not just my purposes, but my methods. We need His Knowledge; we need to understand His purposes. We need to understand His methods.

The point in fact is, can we ever by worrying about anything add or dictate one single moment of the future?

For the eternal optimist (Long termer) – Future is secure, as s/he looks at God to be in control, but does every thing in his/her strength to better things for the future. S/he hopes, plans, dreams, strives, pushes hard, longs and does many a things in a way that, all future is dependent on him/her. The Optimist is ever busy in the day, thinking of the future and bettering it.

For the hopeless pessimist – the present needs to be secured, and does not believe too much in a God who can secure his/her future and so does every thing in his/her strength to better things for the future. S/he hopes, plans, dreams, strives, pushes hard, longs and does many a things in a way that, all future is dependent on him/her. The Pessimist is ever busy in the day, thinking of the future and bettering it.

Wait – Both sound the same. YES!, in fact they read the same word to word – It’s very simple – One sees the Doughnut, the other sees the hole.

Relationship

Ahem! ... the climax is always what we look for!

I wish, I knew that it would end like this – I would have not have indulged in this….what a waste of time, and what a waste of energy. Honestly, it all sucks!... Men are bastards or Women bithces!...

After all this, is this what you give me…is this how much you understand me?

Honey, Love you… you are so……… words fail, the twinkle in the eyes says it all…

My Love – I wish it’s this like for ever…

How many times do we hear this and all of it drives to one single point – how it all ends?

We oscillate between a world of “intent” and “fact”. How we interpret intent and how we interpret fact, and in which order, define the prognosis of many a relationships.

From a “short term view”, feelings are tinctured and a few breaths missed, when one is asked or not asked out, or that one special gesture is done one not. it’s the joy or the sorrow of the moment that defines the feeling. It’s the feeling that takes precedence and the indulgence that brings the Joy. The fact that we can trust the person with the gesture, embrace it and react to it, to ensure that we look forward for a wonderful time ahead is such a wonderful thing.

From a “Long term view” – Hey Hang on, what’s this guy’s or girls’ intent in saying this? Why does s/he have to do this. Are his/her’s intentions right, what if they are wrong? I want to absolutely make sure that that we can trust the person with the gesture, embrace it and react to it, to ensure that we look forward for a wonderful time ahead is such a wonderful thing.

Wait – Both sound the same. YES!, in fact they read the same word to word – It’s very simple – from moment to moment, we switch and oscillate between these two views, both tending to the same end, but look at the difference!

So after all this, should we conclude that the eternal friction of “short term”Vs. “long term” needs to keep spoiling our “present” day? I believe, if we just take one breath back, and see what view we are adopting at that point in time, that makes all the difference.

In conclusion:
It’s the oscillation that keeps the air moving, the fluctuation that keeps the heart throbbing, and it’s the non-constancy of things that make them interesting. One thing that’s absolute is that -the variables of an absolute paradigm are relative.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

“A short Term View” Vs. “A Long Term View”–Part 1

It’s the oscillation that keeps the air moving, the fluctuation that keeps the heart throbbing, and it’s the non-constancy of things that make them interesting. One thing that’s absolute is that - the variables of an absolute paradigm are relative.

Many a time, we look at things from quote-unquote perspectives called “A Short Term View” and “A long Term View”. The interplay of these two views juggle us up with some of our deepest desires, wants, needs, goals and influence how we react, talk and behave at a moment of time. A simple conflict of these views unleashes a plethora of emotions, events and shape up what we are.

I want to deal with this topic on 4 planes: Career, Family, God and Relationships (In alphabetical Order)

Career

Ahem!...at last you got the one Job you cherished for, and have landed in the “dream” job that goes in line with your over all aspirations, your Large Grander plan and fills your lungs with excess air to make you give those big Sighs of jubilation or relief .

OR

You seemingly made a compromise to get in a job, so that you really want to use this time, to make things fall in line with your over all aspirations, your Large Grander plan and fills your lungs with excess air to make you give those big Sighs of relief.

Hold on, it sounds that same right, in fact reads exactly word to word. Then how come one instance leaves you with a feeling of “good” and another with a feeling of “Dirt”? Yup, in one you take a Long term view, and feel that things are fallen in place, and you are heading in the planned direction and in the other, you have taken a short term view and apparently “compromised” but still heading in the same planned direction.

The fact is we are still heading out in the same direction – except the roads might have got a lil rougher – But both are still headed in the same direction called “Progress”. The only difference – is a case of applied “Sour Grape” variable – We invariable measure our progress relative to what some one or how some one is doing – and the feeling is a “Sour Grape”. – Point in fact – Still headed in the same direction – Enjoy the ride and discover new things along the way – Sound Stupid – Taste this – Assume you have a Bloody Bitch (or dog) of a Boss – you hate him/her….makes life miserable.

Short Term View: Kill the boss, Kick the dirt, spit fire, and indulge in self appreciation.
Long Term View: this Boss is teaching me what not to become, shows me how bad things can go…and above all gears you for better challenges…. Oh my God…does this sound Positive…well it works occasionally to flip the view.

Family

Hmmm…that’s how things start when you want to speak about family. Somehow, there never seems to be one coherent point between “I” in the cool generation, and between “them” from yester years. (And how fast ppl can move from the cool generation to Yester years :P), and surprising we all co-exist (dinn get a better word). It’s like; you can’t stop cribbing, but still long to be in the same environment to crib.

You want to go Hiking, and your parents think you might have difficulty raising your son – cos you might break your leg, get impaired, and thus affect your ability to earn…blah..Blah…. Hang on! you probably don’t even have a steady going Girl / boy Friend……and after topping the “To be Prayed for” list in you family for several months, sense dawns on us to look at life from a real long term view, and we start planning…and…say –

You say to your parents, I have thought hard…and…this is the “sense” I got in – I want to go to XYZ University, study, become big ….blah blah….and you get a response….like “Are you Crazy”....remember you will not be young for long…enjoy life….take risks… ..get married… Huh?

The point in fact – Both parties take and either view at every single point of time, including the time every one in the family agrees on something (each are agreeing to a different thing than what you have agreed for). It’s this difference of view points that really bring the balance…and all of us are heading forward….long term!

This ends the part 1 … I will write about God, Relationship and the conclusion to this after a couple of days